The Warning Signs Of InSaNiTy

[blackswordsman]

courtesy of Mychal Phillip Sajulga

1. Your friends tell you that you have been acting strange lately, and
then you 'imung mama!' or 'kayawa basad?'
2. Everyone you meet appears to be giving you the middle finger; including Fr. Jett.
3. You give everyone you meet the middle finger; including Fr. Jett.
3. You start out each morning with a 30-minute jog around the bathroom.
4. You text some random number, saying I like dogs.
4. You text everybody on your GM list, informing everyone to that wearing of uniforms starts in November, of 2008. (si
Freddie, haha)
5. Every time you see a street sign, you have a tremendous urge to
relieve yourself on it.
5. Every time you see a kaamulan banner, you have a tremendous urge to steal it and put it in your room; for sentimental
reasons.
6. You wear your boxers on your head because you heard it will ward of
evil dandruff spirits.
7. Whenever you see Boy and Kris on SNN. You find yourself saying, "thats the gayest thing I've ever seen".
8. You're always having to apologize to your next door neighbor for setting fire to his dog.
9. Every commercial you hear on the radio reminds you of death.
10. People stay away from you whenever they hear you howl.
1. Your breath smells more and more like white-mice each passing day.
12. You laugh out loud during funerals.
13. When your doctor tells you to say ah, you yell out "RAPE! RAPE!"
14. You fight whatever your doctor tells you to do, even for the prescription.
15. Nobody listens to you anymore, because they can't understand you
through that scuba mask.
16. You wear your lab equipment (gown, masks, goggles) whenever you're cooking for breakfast.
17. You begin to stop and consider all of the ants you nuked with molten plastic as a child, and worry that their ancestors
are going to one day seek revenge.
18. Your main talent falls short then runs the opposite of what it should be doing for you. More like sad, than insane.
19. You have meaningful conversations with your dog.
20. Your teacher pretends you don't exist, just to play along with your little illusion.
21. You collect the air in which you've shared with your ultimate idol.
22. Everytime the phone rings, you shout, "Someone cares! Someone f-king cares!"
23. you lol at jing² and jong² jokes, and think its the standard of what comedy should be
24. You like cats. Especially with mayo.
25. You scream "I've got a knife!" to people who try to sell you things.
26. You scream "I've got a knife!" to people at your family reunion.
27. You cry at the end of every episode of Betty La Fea, because she's so fugly but really hot in rl.
28. You put socks in the microwave for dry cleaning.
29. Whenever you listen to the radio, the music sounds backwards.
30. You find the one your staring at smiles back at you even though your 'undressing her in your mind'
31. You have a predominant fear of bleach.
32. You wake up each morning and find yourself sitting on your head in the
middle of your washing machine.
33. Your dentist asks you why each individual tooth has your name
etched on it, and you tell him it's for security reasons.
34. blonde (bulaw) hair on morenas excites you.
35. When the waiter asks for your order, you ask to go into another
room to tell him, because "the napkins have ears."
36. When the canteen attendant asks for your order, you ask for propel water
then you eagerly shout "its not just water, its propel! bitch!"
37. You text, and exchange pleasantries to 222 (or any other balance inquiry numbers) whenever you're feeling lonely. No, not
insanity. New level of sad, maybe.
38. You tend to agree with everything your mother's dead uncle tells you.
40. Every time you see the commercial of John Loyd's Choco Lava, you think
to yourself, "I think I'll kill the president today, and blame it on neurotic breakdown due to this commercial"
41. You text random people and ask "who you?" or "where na you? gahi na me."
42. Your main goal in life is to become the president of diarrhea.
43. Nearly everything you say involves the word, "imong mama!"
44. You argue with yourself about which is better, to be eaten by a koala
or to be loved by an infectious disease.
45. You like to watch cheerleaders for prolonged periods of time, and
deceive yourself by appreciating how they do their stunts. Who are you deceiving?
46. You think that a janitorial job wouldn't be so bad, once you got used to it.
47. You seriously weigh your options for a carreer in speed encoding
48. You try to make a list of the Warning Signs of Insanity. (cough)
49. People offer you help, but you unfortunately interpret this as a
violation of your rights as a boysenberry.
50. You like reading lists like this.
51. You like editing and adding your own weirdness for lists like this
52. You experience periods of time when your just sitting in front of the tv, listening to your ipod, playing grandtheft auto
on a psp, while having a conversation on the cel.
53. You begin to start almost every conversation with a mumbling 'kayawa basad?'
54. You check your e-mail about six times a day, only to find that nobody
cares enough to send anything to you.
55. You go inside the male cr to cheer yourself up, and when that doesn't work
you go inside the female cr to cheer yourself up.
56. You think a pin stripe tattoo on the small of your back (ho stamp) would be fitting for your 18th birthday.
57. You start to repeat yourself.
58. You start to repeat yourself.
59. You start telling bad jokes for cheap laughs.
60. You recognize that you are doing so.
61. You blatantly announce it.
62. You keep smiling whenever you're passing the cctv cams near the guard house; big brother might be watching, don't do
anything suspicious
63. Your greatest accomplishment to date in your college career is your
new-found ability to yawn without opening your mouth.
64. You resort to mass posting bulletins as your sole means of unabashedly begging for attention.